Going to forward to my friends now in FB. Ahhh shit. All for Justin Beiber, how cute.. Just out trolling, carry on haha. You probably know all of the Justin Websites.
I can just see you now…35 years old, cats, and lbs. Get a life, and a waist. Go rent a brain cell and read the joke again. Are you making his money, Aim Pownall? I think not. What an idiot. She has a boyfriend? They tell us to send our clothes to the starving in Africa, Believe me if they can fit into mine they are not starving…. A divorced man walks over to his ex-wifes new hubby n asked…so how does it feel enjoying 2nd hand goods?.. Why the hell does everyone dis on Justin bieber? What did he do to you?
My bf said he was gunna give me the world but i told him in this rate of crimes n this resesion i dont want it lol …. Please copy and paste this to your status if you know someone, or have been affected by someone who needs a punch in the face.
People who need a punch in the face affect the lives of many. There is still no known cure for someone who deserves a punch in the face, except for a punch in the face.
But we can still raise awareness! I think its hilarious! Answer: Mother fucker.. If enough of you do this, you CAN make a difference! Hello everyone. Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine.
But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? New one… X thought he saw a ninja while driving home today… Turned out to be just a light pole… Or was it?
I just made this one up.. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Time limit is exhausted. Business Marketing Social Media Marketing.
Such a Wonderful Collection.. LOL soooo funny laughed till I cried. Lol love all the Justin Bieber jokes. My favorite one was about eating the giant marshmallow, and waking up to find your pillow gone.
Fab …………….!! The Justin Bieber jokes are not funny. None of this was funny. It was crappy grammar and punctuation also.
These are seriously funny. If u wanna see more funny fb statuses go to funnystatus. You americans are soo weird lol. Slept like log last night,, woke up in the fireplace. That awkward moment when Pinocchio and Voldemort meet. This stuff really made me laugh.
Where do you keep all of that tomato sauce? One of mine is on there… neet! Try putting this on your status if you want your friends to get a laugh. Can I get 69 likes on this. Sorry, I just need something to match my full-time job. Eww wtf who would say tat loke ugh what if there is younger people reading thiz. If I tell you your ass looks fat will you stop asking? A lot of people have no talent.
Everything is made in china , except babies, theyre made vachina c;. Too many cmoplnimets too little space, thanks! Very good blog. Much obliged. I Love these hahahaaa! Freakin Funny i love the ladder! Well fuck u! If, all men are dogs…I guess dat just makes all women pussy cats..? Assholes and opinions everybody has one and yours stink.
These are really funny i use them for my statuses on facebook. Hey, Jay Murphy, that was pretty good lol. As if talkin to my wall is bad enuff…i have to type it on my facebook wall too. Steve Jobs is dead, you idiot; it was all over the news! Oh shyt this is so fucking funny. Awesome stuff, really appreciable, searching for that from long time.
Good list. Girl: Yhur a butthole.. This stuff is great, thanks guys! This is so hilarious. I love the justin beaver ones they seriously made my day. Nyssa Usher! Very nice jokes…. LawL love thes things but some are tooo stupid. Lovee thessee maaan ther soo funnyy.. The Justin Bieber ones r superb. The Justin Bieber ones were my favorite! Twinkle Twinkle little whore relationships come in twos, not in fours. Twinkle Twinkle my little slut spread your cheeks and whipe your butt. Twinkle Twinkle little slut spread your cheeks so I can fuck your butt.
Dang, I didnt think anybody knew that I was gay…. I got so many likes from these on FB,they had ma Lmao! Wow, that funny! But some are too icky. My niece Mason was looking at my laptop screen!! These were soo alsome.. Omg I posted one of these statuses and got Almost 4 like in 5 minutes! This stastus with codebar is the best.
This is some funny ass shit! This is awesome! I love it!! Never moon a werewolf. Ketamine — Just say nay How do deaf people know if someone is screaming or yawning? Why does everyone think my Dads are gay? I just ended a long-term relationship today. Well some of these are really funny , Others just stupid! Lmao xD this made my day! Yo , This Wensite 2 Fye! Dinosaurs were lies, fed to us to cover up the existence of Pokemon.
Your mom… bitch quit reading status and go make me a damn sandwich! This is some funny ass shit!!! Really good website haha pissed myself just reading them!!
Its funny guys remember your bra size but not your birthdate.. This comment is hacked, you can like it as many times as you like :. Ahaha dont u just live how my name and my comment coincide?
OH WOW!! Men marry becoz they are tired, women becoz they are curious;n both are disappointed; lolx;. Haha , wow , half of it really make sense! The other half ….. No offense to blondes!
Oh im sorry im not perfect for you but did you ever realize that your full of flaws too?? Thats a stupid thing to say to a girl and to some girls it really offends them. This is so great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wont be impressed with science until i can download a zinger burger…:-p. I think we have a winner… :. Is it just me, or is the ice cream machine at McDonalds always broken..
The comments are funnier than the statuses! Its Awe some!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bin Laden just updated her Facebook status to single. Definition of drowning is suffocating in water, so ye fish cant drown douche bag!! Q: What do you do for a living? Insert coin here: [] to view status. Is that what happened to you or did your mama forget to swallow. Neither should ugly people get sex — they produce ugly kids!
Food for thought: The worst fight with a fly, is in a public restroom…Move!!! The best part is…….. The bit about a skirt and skin to skin. Suffocation is not being able to breathe. Drowning is suffocation due to water or other fluid. Some good ones in there. Who cares! I get Both…;. What is wrong with you? Haha that was kind of funny. Roses are red violets are black, girl your chest is as flat as you back. Relationships are like fat people most of them dont work out.
That may be but only in heavan, those gals never leave you. Please diposit 25 cents to view my status :. This is so hilarious!!!!! I can;t believe i used to like that guy.
When life gives you AIDS, make lemon-aids. Now a tanned Ginger is a different story…. Take life as it comes in your face and runs down your chin. Phttt; love this one. You can steal my status updates if you like, but I lick every single one before I post them. Is so cool that the Aztec predicted his birth. Violence is not the answer, it is the question and the answer is yes. Love em! Starring them in my arsenal. Places and locations. This feature makes it possible for viewers of your status updates to know where you are posting from.
These days, with our mobile devices, it is easy to put up your location. If you are using the desktop app, you can simply click the map set beside the status update box. This will help add your location with ease. Post scheduling. This feature ensures that you can decide when your post will be uploaded and revealed to viewers. It is all about timing. You can either backdate the post or set the time it will come up in the nearest future.
To achieve this, you need to add the date day, month, and year and time hour and minute. Facebook will work with these to upload your status update and make it public.
Funny is a word which refers to anything that arouses laughter, something amusing or comical. Bringing it to bear on Facebook statuses, it means statuses that arouse laughter. When you post this kind of status, a lot of your friends are going have fun reading through. It can be a bit difficult if you are not comical by nature.
To help you, we have put together a few questions to try out on your Facebook account. By now you must have gotten acquainted with Facebook status updates. You should also have understood how important funny Facebook status is and our list should have inspired you. They are really interesting and you can come up with yours. Share some of yours with us in the comments section.
Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. What are Facebook statuses? When you try to argue with an idiot, he pulls you to his level then usurps you with his experience. Prayed to God to bless me with a bike. After waiting for a minute, I went on to steal one from the mall. Imagine the world we live in today. You place a call to and then to a pizza shop. Be sure that your pizza will arrive first, the police second.
After all, a person cannot be a car just because he works in a garage. Women fake orgasms, just the way men fake relationships. A fool is considered wise until he speaks a few words. I hardly think of hurting you, but I think of it anyway. If I agree with you on a matter, it implies we both lost. Do we really grow up? I guess we all juts develop the ability of self-control in public, in our minds we all are children.
Hungry and horny are two emotions common to every man. If you see a man not erect, he is probably hungry. Politicians share a certain characteristic with diapers, they stink. This is why they should be changed frequently. Having sex and playing bridge is one and the same in several respects. You know your partner is bad when your hand is good. Mum called me a son of a bitch all the time, if only she understood what it meant.
Research and plagiarism are sons of the same mother, theft. The difference is that the former is stolen from a number of people and the latter, from a single person.
It is better for a fool to remain silent, he would likely be perceived as wise. Do you wonder if no one would miss you? Try missing a few payments. One thing is really confusing. All some people are good for, like slinkies, is making us laugh at their barrel roll down the stairs. What they achieve within a week of coming into the life of a man is incredible.
People love to read and comment on funny or even embarrassing things happening to others, usually because they can relate! If a status is too long, or takes forever to get to the point, the reader may lose interest and not find it entertaining.
Avoid being too long-winded. Funny Facebook statuses should be a burst of brilliance, rather than a too long, needs-to-get-to-the-point, rambling piece of writing.
Posts funny images or videos, or even memes. If you need inspiration, check out our extensive list of funny social media memes or funny social media quotes. Take a look online for suggested funny status material and search for the best funny quotes for Facebook status updates.
Otherwise it may come out as not funny at all. Be true to yourself, and what you find entertaining, and the status will come to you. I hope you can find the right one for you if you need one. In the meanwhile, Happy Facebook-ing! See also: Does Facebook still have the 20 text rule? Thanks for this amazing article. Exactly this is required when getting ready to plan several posts for my Facebook page.
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